[Fwd: In the Navy from N4ZH, Terry]

David V. Rogers dvrogers@bellatlantic.net
Sat, 07 Nov 1998 15:53:54 -0500

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Date: Fri, 06 Nov 1998 13:56:05 -0500
To: avers@ibm.net (Denny Avers, W3DRY), BBaddley@aol.com (Ben Baddley, W4FQT),
        GBilger@juno.com (Glenn Bilger, W4OCC),
        LLBradley@aol.com (Lew Bradley, W4SWP),
        112037.537@compuserve.com (John Brogden),
        Frank Brooks <FrankW4UMC@aol.com>, W4LBM@aol.com (Howard Bullock),
        w3awu@juno.com (Al Cammarata), wigo@aol.com (Bob Cannon W4IGO),
        alcaron@erols.com (Armand "Bud" Caron, WA3TNQ),
        AG4R@erols.com (Wayne Cooper), K1ZAT@dsport.com (J. D. Delancy, K1ZAT),
        piklepatch@aol.com (Bill Dill, N5OAJ),
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        JAKHAMMETT@aol.com (Jack Hammett K4VV),
        Warren Hayes <skip250@concentric.net>,
        fhaynes@juno.com (Francis J Haynes, W4NUA),
        W4LBL@aol.com (Joe Herrmann, W4LBL),
        thines@mail92.mitre.org (Terry Hines, N4ZH),
        thines@MSIS.dmso.mil (Terry Hines, N4ZH),
        Peter Hurd N1SS <n1ss@aol.com>, Peter Hurd N1SS <n1ss@ainop.com>,
        jackson@us.net (B.C. "Jay" Jackson, Jr., W4VG),
        JRJNVV@aol.com (Ray Johnson, K5RJ),
        John Johnston W3BE <jjohnsto@erols.com>, k4eux@aol.com (Elmer Jones),
        Dave Kausal <KausalD@GTE.net>, w4zc@clark.net (Jack Kelleher),
        w4ee@aol.com (Jim Laughter, W4EE),
        mackeyf@erols.com (Frank Mackey, N4GUS),
        s_martin@ix.netcom.com (Stephen Martin, K3KQ),
        GMessmer@erols.com (Gordon Messmer, W4IQA),
        "William G. Mills" <WMILLS@gmc.cc.ga.us>,
        gapaull@juno.com (George A Paull),
        dvrogers@bellatlantic.net (Dave Rogers, K9RKH),
        rrucker@clark.net (Dick Rucker, KM4ML),
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        W4AWL@juno.com, w4hu@juno.com (John Swafford),
        Wb4jjj@aol.com (Al Wheeler, WB4JJJ), James Wilcox <jimw@juno.com>,
        Bix W4BIX <bix@ricochet.net>, bobdooley@aol.com (Bob Dooley, KK4GB),
        HuxD@erols.com (Luther Hux, N4BZQ), Larry Parfitt <Lcparfitt@aol.com>,
        BobP@worldnet.att.net (Bob Plamondon, W6BOB),
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From: Dick Rucker <rrucker@clark.net>
Subject: In the Navy from N4ZH, Terry
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>Date: Fri, 06 Nov 1998
>To: rrucker@mail.clark.net
>From: Terry Hines <thines@MSIS.dmso.mil>
>Subject: In the Navy
>Ah - the Navy - It's an adventure ... the suggestions below are made on
>behalf of those who think the Navy is a "TOP GUN" existence.  You know,
>those who watched one too many episodes of JAG, and think that Navy life is
>To experience Navy life, try a couple of these - right in the comfort of
>your own homes.
>1.  Buy a dumpster, paint it gray and live in it for 6 months straight.
>2.  Run all of the piping and wires inside your house on the outside of the
>3.  Pump 10 inches of nasty, crappy water into your basement, then pump it
>out, clean up, and paint the basement "deck gray."
>4.  Every couple of weeks, dress up in your best clothes and go the
>scummiest part of town, find the most run down, trashy bar you can, pay $10
>per beer until you're hammered, then walk home in the freezing cold.
>5.  Perform a weekly disassembly and inspection of your lawnmower.
>6.  On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays turn your water temperature up to
>200 degrees, then on Tuesday and Thursday turn it down to 10 degrees.  On
>Saturdays, and Sundays declare to your entire family that they used too
>much water during the week, so all showering is secured.
>7.  Raise your bed to within 6 inches of the ceiling.
>8.  Have your next door neighbor come over each day at 5am, and blow a
>whistle so loud that Helen Keller could hear it and shout "Reveille,
>Reveille, all hands heave out and trice up."
>9.  Have your mother-in-law write down everything she's going to do the
>following day, then have her make you stand in the back yard at 6am and
>read it to you.
>10.  Eat the raunchiest Mexican food you can find for three days straight,
>then lock the bathroom door for 12 hours, and hang a sign on it that reads
>"Secured - contact OA DIV at X-3053."
>11.  Submit a request form to your father-in-law, asking if it's ok for you
>to leave your house before 3pm.
>12.  Invite 200 of your not-so-closest friends to come over, then board up
>all the windows and doors to your house for 6 months. After the 6 months is
>up, take down the boards, and since you're on duty, wave at your friends
>and family through the front window of your home...you can't leave until
>the next day.
>13.  Shower with above-mentioned friends.
>14.  Make your family qualify to operate all the appliances in your home
>(i.e. Dishwasher operator, blender technician, etc)
>15.  Walk around your car for 4 hours checking the tire pressure every 15
>16.  Sit in your car and let it run for 4 hours before going anywhere. This
>is to ensure your engine is properly "lit off".
>17.  Empty all the garbage bins in your house, and sweep your driveway 3
>times a day, whether they need it or not.
>18.  Repaint your entire house once a month.
>19.  Cook all of your food blindfolded, groping for any spice and seasoning
>you can get your hands on.
>20.  Have your neighbor collect all your mail for a month, randomly
>losing every 5th item.
>21.  Spend $20,000 on a satellite system for your TV, but only watch CNN
>and the Weather Channel.
>22.  Have your 5-year-old cousin give you a haircut with goat shears.
>23.  Sew back pockets to the front of your pants.
>24.  Spend 2 weeks in the red-light districts of Europe, and call it "world
>25.  Attempt to spend 5 years working at McDonald, and NOT get promoted.
>26.  Needle gun the aluminum siding on your house after your neighbors have
>gone to bed.